Keir Starmer waged war this week on the “class ceiling”, promising that Labour will give priority to ensuring pupils of all backgrounds are able to speak English fluently and express themselves clearly.
But in truth, you English don’t really speak English – you speak euphemism. When I first moved to London 30 odd years ago, it took time to realise that a visitor needs those little United Nations headphones to decipher everything you say. For example, when a host would turn to me and purr “Oh, do stay for another drink”, I would plunge head first into the Pimms. I didn’t realise that translates as, “leave immediately and never darken my door again”.
