What do we think of when we think of Christmas? Michael Bublé, maybe. Parsnips, perhaps. Television that ranges from delightful to dire – definitely. Christmas TV is a constant but whether it’s any good is another matter entirely.
We got our mitts on a selection of some of the biggest shows that are on the way, so we can help you choose what to prioritise when you are too Christmassed out to think.
From Ncuti Gatwa’s first full Doctor Who episode to the arrival of new dramas Truelove and The Castaways, here’s what you can expect on your screens this festive season, and our verdict on what’s actually worth watching…
A Ghost Story for Christmas: Lot No 249
BBC Two, Christmas Eve
Get out the Baileys because you will probably enjoy Mark Gatiss’s adaptation of Arthur Conan Doyle’s short story more if you are slightly drunk. Here you have Kit Harington and Freddie Fox, all cut-glass vowels and waistcoats, slapping each other in the face. Why? Because eccentric Oxford don Edward Bellingham, played by Fox, has bought an ancient mummy that may or may not be possessed, and everyone is a bit unnerved. There’s not a woman in sight – well, it was Oxford in 1881 – but there’s plenty of candlelit, high camp gothic atmosphere. Short and sweet at 30 minutes, the story isn’t a spooky Christmas tale of classic proportions, but it is old-fashioned fun. Jessie Thompson
The Heist Before Christmas
Sky Max, Christmas Eve
Pyromania, vandalism, and an armed robbery by Santa in the first 10 minutes don’t exactly scream “family Christmas show”. But this one-off adventure starring James Nesbitt and Timothy Spall as two Father Christmases is certainly aiming for that. Beyond the surprising opening moments is a heartbreaking story of a single mum, wishing she could make Christmas special for her two young children. Bamber Todd’s Mikey, the eldest, never takes off his jacket, even while he sleeps, showing a struggling working-class family amid a cost of living crisis in a cold, snowy Northern Ireland. The Heist before Christmas deals with the brutal reality that many families will be experiencing this festive period, and will make many feel grateful for what they might have at Christmas time. Finn Cliff Hodges
Mrs Brown’s Boys
BBC One, Christmas Day
The turkey giblets of Christmas TV, in that it ought to be swiftly extracted and tossed in the nearest waste disposal bin, the Mrs Brown’s Boys festive special has returned with trademark ignominy. Lurching between hacky comic mugging and almost hallucinatory amounts of schmaltz, the first of two episodes sees Brendan O’Carroll’s malignant granny pine for her lost rocking horse, give shelter to an Alzheimer’s-afflicted old woman, and pull a whisk from her undergarments. More than a decade into its existence, this show is now firmly established as its own kind of white noise – a tribute to vintage sitcom tat, and a prehistoric era of entertainment in which live studio audiences seal-clap to the vague sound of jokes. In 2023, though? Pass the sherry. Adam White
Doctor Who: “The Church of Ruby Rose”
BBC One, Christmas Day
The traditional Christmas Day Doctor Who has been lost in time and space for the past several years, with the Tardis instead beaming into living rooms on 1 January. But returning showrunner Russell T Davies has gone old school in 2023, with the Doctor confirmed for his first 25 December appearance since 2017. “The Church of Ruby Rose” promises to be something old and new. Fifteenth Doctor Ncuti Gatwa will embark on his “first epic adventure” – having been introduced in the last of the David Tennant comeback instalments that celebrated the character’s 60th anniversary. He will be joined by his new companion Ruby Sunday, played by Coronation Street’s Millie Gibson. Plus there will be a cameo from Davina McCall, who previously graced the series in 2005. Hold on to your sonic screwdrivers – it’s going to be special. Ed Power
The cast of Viagra drama ‘Men Up’
Ghosts Christmas Special
BBC One, Christmas Day
Pass the tissues. Everyone’s favourite paranormal sitcom Ghosts is coming to an end after five seasons – though not before giving us a wonderful Christmas special as a parting gift. Alison (Charlotte Ritchie) and Mike (Kiell Smith-Bynoe) are adding one more resident to Button House with their newborn baby Mia, home from the hospital and ready to meet her many spectral roommates. Might I suggest anyone hosting annoying in-laws this holiday season invite them to watch, too, as Mike’s busy-body mum (Sutara Gayle) gets in the way of the celebrations – hopefully they’ll get the hint. Annabel Nugent
Tabby McTat
Sheridan Smith as plane crash survivor Lori Holme in ‘The Castaways’
